As a result I decided to sketch out a list of the way I treat people with regards to how well I know them. Though the list people has distinct categories in reality it's more of a continuum. Also thinking about it there are two significant continuum's. One for friends and one for blood relatives.
There undoubtedly should also be a third category being "spouse" but seeing I don't even have a girl friend I decided that was best left out.
Any way here is a list of some of the different ways I treat people depending on the type and state of the relationship.
Strangers:
- Limited to small talk about, a current event, the weather or something similar.
- Physical contact: minimal/none
- Happy to talk about every day stuff, ie job, study, current events etc
- Interested in certain of their primary interests
- Physical contact: Handshake level
- Happy to discuss a bit about what I'm doing, what they're doing, there primary interests
- Physical contact: Handshake/backslap level
- Happy to talk about most stuff, what I'm doing, what they're doing, Interests, opinions, what I feel in brief
- Willing to help if needed
- Happy to make jokes at their/my expense
- Physical contact: Don't mind hugs from members of the "fairer sex", but I won't initiate them {way to shy}.
- Happy to talk about nearly anything, Interests, opinions, beliefs, hobbies, past times, future aspirations, emotions/feelings (to a limited degree) etc
- Enjoy spending time with them even if nothing much is happening
- Want to know more about them what makes them up as a person
- Likely to attend events I'm not particularly interested in they're going to
- Willing to go out of way to help if needed.
- Will answer many personally questions directly if asked (ie birthday, middle name, other personal)
- Physical contact: Happy with hugs from members of the "fairer sex" {from the other sex would require exceptional circumstances :-)}, but I won't initiate them {way to shy to do that}.
Girl Friend (never yet reached so theoretical :-P):
- All attributes assigned to best friend
- Would answer pretty much any personal question truthfully and directly
- Interested in everything about them, their friends, family, interests, desires etc
- Greatly enjoy spending time with them, and strongly desire to do so
- Physical contact: holding hands, hugs, kissing, general physical contact imitated by either party etc {hmm not sure I should include this bit :) seems a little odd!}
- And many other things that will no doubt be determined should I every find someone who is equally as interested in my self
The second continuum would be for family, direct and extended (all blood relations). The continuum would be much the same as for the friendship one with a few additions at all levels and obviously lacking the girl friend category (nearly posted it with out this bit :| that would have been bad, I can quite easily imagine some of the comments!)
Blood relatives/Family:
- Willing to discuss most stuff
- Willing to answer many personal questions truthfully
- Interested in most things about them
- Physical contact: Hugs, kisses both genders fine
Any way this hopefully gives you some idea of the possibly bizare personal inhibitions I have floating around somewhere in my head.
Note that these aren't hard and fast categories, they are the result of a mix of thoughts from rather late at night.
Also do other people also note that they treat people differently depending on how well they know them?
I'd expect most to do so, and I'd expect that most people would have quite differing degrees of how they treat people when compared to each other.
